tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post7663074326485003371..comments2024-03-12T18:18:10.646+13:00Comments on How the hell does this work?: I've Been a Naughty BoyTwisted Scottish Bastardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.comBlogger26125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-61352344395426337932012-07-03T08:12:16.407+12:002012-07-03T08:12:16.407+12:00My ring tone for my bride is "It's Tricky...My ring tone for my bride is "It's Tricky" by Run-DMC. Relevance to post? None!<br /><br />I took a day off to have my cat of 14 years put to sleep and my employer charged me a vacation day. What a hero.<br /><br />Now you must, MUST leave empty cheese packets all over the house. Oh, she'll laugh and laugh!The Unbearable Banishmenthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05704208968630911021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-54200720982692026642012-07-02T16:41:47.642+12:002012-07-02T16:41:47.642+12:00Amateur! No wonder you got caught. I have a secret...Amateur! No wonder you got caught. I have a secret lolly and potato chip stash in the garage, hidden under a pile of uninviting spare computer parts. I hide the wrappers in the bottom of the new bin bag each week. And she wonders why I spend so much time in the shed.Xhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01962931483973457516noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-3687120394706464372012-07-02T10:04:22.276+12:002012-07-02T10:04:22.276+12:00Sorry for puzzling you, but I get a bit puzzled as...Sorry for puzzling you, but I get a bit puzzled as well. According to the unwritten law of Chez TSB, I can eat anything I want as long as:<br />a) It's fruit<br />or<br />b) It's healthy.<br />or<br />c) beloved doesn't get to know about it.<br />Leaving food wrappings under the bed is seemingly the next thing to complete moral degeneracy.<br /><br />*Gasp* THREE crisp packets...you know of course that means you're going to burn in Hell?Twisted Scottish Bastardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-87617441815095640012012-07-02T07:37:48.492+12:002012-07-02T07:37:48.492+12:00Im puzzled.Are you on a diet?Aren't you allowe...Im puzzled.Are you on a diet?Aren't you allowed cheese??<br />I've just pulled 3 empty crisp packets from under our bed..Northern Snippethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07207173438875166390noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-65569343785634939032012-07-02T06:01:42.222+12:002012-07-02T06:01:42.222+12:00Correct Jen. I think she's worried that the d...Correct Jen. I think she's worried that the debris will attract rats or wetas.Twisted Scottish Bastardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-31021474513098639622012-07-02T03:10:20.545+12:002012-07-02T03:10:20.545+12:00So you're not in trouble for eating the cheese...So you're not in trouble for eating the cheese, but for not disposing of the wrapper in an approved manner?Patience_Crabstickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16860012969550268614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-78641408548717832012012-07-01T15:56:10.164+12:002012-07-01T15:56:10.164+12:00VG: Fruit has never been or will never be on my me...VG: Fruit has never been or will never be on my menu.Twisted Scottish Bastardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-36174267737930024802012-07-01T15:55:24.181+12:002012-07-01T15:55:24.181+12:00I've tried that Laoch, but if I go much larger...I've tried that Laoch, but if I go much larger, I'll be in the "Go Directly To Hell" range.Twisted Scottish Bastardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-9693059895641226982012-07-01T15:53:45.578+12:002012-07-01T15:53:45.578+12:0034 bloody years.
I'm still a bloke, sort of. ...34 bloody years.<br /><br />I'm still a bloke, sort of. <br />I still drink beer.<br />If I'm allowed.Twisted Scottish Bastardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-85632921084071263512012-07-01T15:22:54.439+12:002012-07-01T15:22:54.439+12:00Ah, you've been married a long time.... You...Ah, you've been married a long time.... You've had the MAN beaten out of you (nearly)Tempohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01023337124226272532noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-73203398442680804512012-06-30T14:02:38.506+12:002012-06-30T14:02:38.506+12:00My dear late mother used to enjoy snacking on frui...My dear late mother used to enjoy snacking on fruit while in bed reading before going to sleep.<br />I used to think this odd, but hey it was fruit and healthy. Little did I know that she left her apple cores and banana skins under the bed. As I discovered one day when vacuuming the house for her. Uckk. I reckon that discovery was much worse thatn finidng cheese wrappers!<br /><br />So TSB start eating fruit snacks and leave the skins under the bed. Then see what Mrs Twisted has to say about that!Valley Girlnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-38434291677620061722012-06-30T09:38:34.043+12:002012-06-30T09:38:34.043+12:00You need to be sinning on a much larger scale so t...You need to be sinning on a much larger scale so that these minor transgressions will pass without comment.Sultanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06506141014376919585noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-3193127917646871582012-06-30T04:55:35.868+12:002012-06-30T04:55:35.868+12:00I'm glad as ever that my pain helps others.
B...I'm glad as ever that my pain helps others.<br /><br />Be careful of eating chicken legs under a blanket. They tend to leave yellow stains which might be misinterpreted.<br /><br />No I'm quite safe from any physical assault. In some ways I'd almost prefer it, but what I get is the "hurt look", "the sigh" and of course the worst of all, being told "Think of the children, be a good example"Twisted Scottish Bastardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-67934806371188041882012-06-30T04:51:37.907+12:002012-06-30T04:51:37.907+12:00Already done Austan, she found the SECOND cheese p...Already done Austan, she found the SECOND cheese packet last night.<br /><br />What can I say.<br /><br />I like cheese.<br /><br />Praise any available or existing diety that she didn't look in the bedside cabinet drawer, as I think I've still got an empty salami wrapper in there.Twisted Scottish Bastardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-86937638097465163422012-06-30T04:50:46.594+12:002012-06-30T04:50:46.594+12:00I started reading this as I was eating an illicit ...I started reading this as I was eating an illicit chicken leg. Thanks to your cheese related bollocking I've disposed of the evidence extra carefully.<br /><br />Scavenging of articles will now take place under a blanket or within inches of a bin. Wrappers will be disposed of pre-mastication and items which may rustle will be avoided.<br /><br />Sorry for your trouble, happy for the timely heads up.<br /><br />Dont forget to pack a book down he back of the trousers in case you get paddled.........Alistairhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16667242161539996736noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-89846972523149393972012-06-30T04:49:06.554+12:002012-06-30T04:49:06.554+12:00OT??? Kindly explain if you have the time.
I also...OT??? Kindly explain if you have the time.<br /><br />I also hope she doesn't, but let's face it, with a chest like that and dressed like that, every blokes eyes are going to be drawn to them like a magnet. There is no choice, it's hardwired.Twisted Scottish Bastardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-38511065434382558742012-06-30T04:46:43.728+12:002012-06-30T04:46:43.728+12:00I'm sorry to say that I don't really know....I'm sorry to say that I don't really know. ALL my dreams are weird these days.<br /><br />Tasty cheese though.Twisted Scottish Bastardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-85754100648977037852012-06-30T04:02:02.638+12:002012-06-30T04:02:02.638+12:00Strategy is key here. If all she has to bitch abou...Strategy is key here. If all she has to bitch about is a cheese wrapper you've been tame much too long. Devise something she'll find that's so entirely anomalous and disgusting that a cheese wrapper gives her the giggles.Austanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05568578637922817033noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-9557318411223936162012-06-29T23:26:00.351+12:002012-06-29T23:26:00.351+12:00OT, but I do hope that woman in the first picture ...OT, but I do hope that woman in the first picture never, ever, complains that men talk to her chest.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-31048235501989088872012-06-29T22:20:44.699+12:002012-06-29T22:20:44.699+12:00Was it worth it . . . Did the "sliver" l...Was it worth it . . . Did the "sliver" lead to more weird dreams?bugerlugs63https://www.blogger.com/profile/08598249255143939365noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-836453741116450122012-06-29T21:17:33.671+12:002012-06-29T21:17:33.671+12:00Excellent idea.
With only one flaw.
If my beloved...Excellent idea.<br />With only one flaw.<br /><br />If my beloved went balistic when she discovered an empty cheese wrapper, how do you think she'd eact to finding a fridge packed with beer, salami and pickles under the bed?<br /><br />I couldn't even begin to calculate the megatonnage.Twisted Scottish Bastardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-54108668107583099372012-06-29T21:14:39.722+12:002012-06-29T21:14:39.722+12:00Are you insane?
Telling the truth hurts...me.
Ev...Are you insane?<br /><br />Telling the truth hurts...me.<br /><br />Everyone else knows it's her fault, but to quote Sergeant Schulz; "I know notzing, I say notzing"Twisted Scottish Bastardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-46677016948945875912012-06-29T20:34:03.994+12:002012-06-29T20:34:03.994+12:00Simple solution - you need a small fridge in the b...Simple solution - you need a small fridge in the bedroom - see man logic gets them everytime ;-)Furtheronhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11903753972242964410noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-20796668172527321452012-06-29T19:38:45.313+12:002012-06-29T19:38:45.313+12:00You will have to learn to hide things better...but...You will have to learn to hide things better...but then, are you not MAN? Master of all you see, Man the destroyer? MAN the hunter? <br />Tell that woman the truth because she deserves that at least. Tell her that it's all her fault for not feeding you mans food, it's all her fault for not bringing you that sliver of cheese before bed....<br />Her fault.<br />Her fault.<br />Her fault.<br />Her fault.Tempohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01023337124226272532noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2556021846818907745.post-85517898160178935562012-06-29T17:05:20.175+12:002012-06-29T17:05:20.175+12:00Sometimes I think that we want to get caught and b...Sometimes I think that we want to get caught and be punished for it.<br /><br />Late night snacks are worth it though.Twisted Scottish Bastardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06825025524038296192noreply@blogger.com