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Monday, 31 December 2012

TSB is going away


For all you readers (if such there may be) of this collection of scurrilous tales, blatant mistruths, outright insults and many, many images of scantily clad ladies if have some bad news.

The entity formerly known as TSB is undergoing a thorough retraining session, designed to mould him into the behaviour expected of a senior member of management.  He will shortly be allowed access to a computer where he will be encouraged to create posts of a positive and uplifting nature with numerous references of a pedagogical nature.

He will of course be unable to refer to himself as TSB as the underlying reference is just not acceptable to all right-thinking people.

He will be reborn as Senior Manager Education (Generic)



Thank you for your patience.

68 comments:

  1. Is that a picture of your new face? It's the cleanest shave I've seen outside of a Gillette commercial.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Gorilla Bananas, I'm glad you think of me as a clean-shaven exemplar of all that is good and PC.
      (SMEG)

      Delete
  2. That sounds a bit ominous. Will be still be allowed to peek at your "weekend" life?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't be afraid looby, I am quite content in my new persona. There are so many things I'll have to chastise you about.

      In my new role I am not allowed a weekend, nor a "life"
      (SMEG)

      Delete
  3. Senior Manager Education (Generic) = SMEG

    Well that sounded familiar.

    Wikipedia says:

    "Smegma (Greek smēgma, "soap"[1]) is a combination of exfoliated (shed) epithelial cells, transudated skin oils, and moisture. It occurs in both female and male mammalian genitalia."

    I wouldn't own up to that if I were you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, I did notice that TC, but I do not have a choice in the matter.

      Isn't life just wonderful?
      (SMEG)

      Delete
    2. No, I have an MSc...MAs are for those lovely people who study the difficult ateas of reading.
      (SMEG)

      Delete
  4. Sorry, the previous comment was repeated (again)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's alright, even the cleverest among us make the occasional mistakes.
      (SMEG)

      Delete
  5. Sorry - can't see that shoe fitting. Your going to hurt your feet!

    Happy Hogmanay to you and yours my friend. And mony o' them!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for your concern Alistair, but my feet are quite well thank you.

      Sorry, i don't celebrate any pagan festivals anymore, and I am forbidden to touch alcohol in any of its evil forms.
      (SMEG)

      Delete
  6. You'd better be back with only minor alterations....what will I do without regular (totally inappropriate) images of scantily clad young things?

    Have an excellent New Year!!!

    See you in 2013!

    Ali x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh AliX, I am so sorry I allowed my baser (former)self to publish those terrible images. You can rest assured that it will be allowed to happen in the future.

      Thank you so much for your good wishes for next year, but every year is now so good.

      (SMEG)

      Delete
  7. You're not going anywhere, bucko. You'd better get your ass back here post-haste. And I don't want a dip in the quality, got it?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for your good wishes TUB, but please don't demean yourself and this forward thinking and completely PC blog by using such rather crude terms.
      The quality in the future will be better, cleaner and totally smut free.
      (SMEG)

      Delete
  8. Fight it, fight it you'll end up a failure like me!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Furtheron, but I cannot fight it. It is just a better way of living.

      Just because you're a failure doesn't mean that you're a bad person. Think positive.
      (SMEG)

      Delete
  9. Say it ain't so, TSB!
    And what The Unbearable Banishment said!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Austan, but I'm quite content in my new role. The only thing that slightly concerns me is the headaches I get if I think of any bad words or concepts.

      (SMEG)

      Delete
  10. Replies
    1. Thank you fishducky, but I'm quite content in my new role. The only thing that slightly concerns me is the headaches I get if I think of any bad words or concepts.

      (SMEG)

      Delete
  11. Replies
    1. Excellent thought Laoch, I'll keep that in mind each and every glorious morning.

      (SMEG)

      Delete
  12. This wont end well...your usual ascorbic personality is likely to be somewhat damaged.... Oh well, no damage done..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for your concern Tempo, but I am sure things will turn out for the better. My vitamin C level is, as always, excellent, but thanks for the hint vis-a-vis my personality.

      Damage is just an alteration required in haste.

      (SMEG)

      Delete
  13. Happy New Year to the new Big Man on Campus at NLHS.
    May you enjoy what remains of hte holdiays and please do have a holiday. About time you went away for your summer sojourn. You need to get nice and rested up for what is going to be a big year for an old guy with all your extra responsibilities now you are a Koro and SME (Better know as an acronym to us comemrce teachers as Small Medium Enterprises - in other words mall businesses - the backbone of our economy). I am sure you will become the new backbone of NLHS unlike the other spineless ones there.

    All the best for a very prosperous 2013 and may you by bouyed along with a regular supply of whisky to keep your motor running. Lang may yer lum reek as they say in bonnie Scotland, or She'll be right in New Zild.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you VG, but I'm really much happier now.

      Alcohol is no longer on my agenda, nor is any form of disagreement. Anyway, you know it's never the lovely children's fault, it's ours.

      (SMEG)

      Delete
    2. OMG what has happenned to you? HAve you hada braintransplant or been brainwashed in prep for
      your new role?? I feel your replies are too nice too generated.. too robotic. I hope you have not become a pedogocical syncophant.
      To stop partaking in your daily dram. Something is not right here. Where are you TSB?

      Delete
  14. Good luck with your image-scrubbing and happy new year!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Jen, I look forward to a future brimming with goodness and correct thinking.

      (SMEG)

      Delete
  15. So you've given in to them - shame on you!
    HNY!
    Di
    X

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for your concern Di, but I'm really much happier looking at life with the correct viewpoint. Have you considered giving all your antiques to a charity? You'll feel much better.

      (SMEG)

      Delete
  16. Replies
    1. Thank you for your concern Jacquelineand..., but why sad? It's really much nicer looking at lie with a postive and completely correct viewpoint.

      (SMEG)

      Delete
  17. Replies
    1. Hello BDM, yes, the whichness of what has been concerning me for some time now, but don't worry, everything will work out for the better.

      (SMEG)

      Delete
  18. "Smeg"....Red Dwarf is back on TV.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know, but it's not as good. BTW, SMEG is a name of a European cooking appliance company.

      Delete
  19. Replies
    1. Buying european (Italian/Chinese) cooking appliance of superior design and exaggerated cost.
      or
      Senior Manager Education (Generic)

      Delete
  20. You have very artistic ears, think that's what you need as a dep head right?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My ears do indeed protrude to a slight degree, but it's the pressure of the brain that really causes it.

      Delete
  21. Never mind. As I pass his office, early on a school day, tradition (and habit) will probably determine that I'll mutter,
    "Morning TSB."

    ReplyDelete
  22. He has gone, gone to another place. A place where the naughiest children sit patiently waiting to break bread with you. Rest in an office TSB.

    ReplyDelete
  23. He's moved on to a better place now. I bet he even gets fully-funded choccy biscuits in his meetings.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Replies
    1. Thansk to the giant fuck-up that is Novopay, I haven't even been paid for the extra hours and responsibilities.

      Delete
    2. Oh you too now. Sharing the pain with us common teaching folk now. I am still waiting for a payment from September last year! Last week finally got the problem acknowledged and a ticket number assigned by Novopay after 6 bloody months. Still no sign of any money though. When you have been waiting for 6 months see how scratchy you are. However I bet you make sure your relievers get paid eh TSB?

      Delete
    3. Just to keep you in the picture, it's now been 6 BLOODY MONTHS and I'm still underpaid by about $12000

      Delete
  25. that's you been away long enough. Come back.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I shall try Ali, just for you. And the odd little bit of dough in your bread bin.

      Delete
  26. "The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
    But I have promises to keep,
    And miles to go before I sleep,
    And miles to go before I sleep."

    R. Frost

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Funnily enough. you have managed to quote from my absolute favourite poem of all time...it's really the only poem I've ever liked, apart from

      "Abou Ben Adhem (may his tribe increase!)
      Awoke one night from a deep dream of peace,..."
      by James Henry Leigh Hunt

      Delete
  27. Hey entity formerly known as TSB - are you ever going to be back? Is the sheep dip process of renewal not working on the old curmedgeon then and you are being ritualistically returned after each failure?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Alistair, it's mostly a mix of exhaustion, lack of time, and zzzzzz

      Delete
  28. *taps foot* this has gone on long enough. I shall hold my breath until you return. Come along!!!! I have photos of Tartarus with a MULLET to show you this week!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dearest AliX,
      your kind thoughts are re-awakening my urge to post. My curiosity about Tartarus's mullet is however minute and diminishing by the minute.

      BTW, Like your new photo...it suits you.

      Delete
  29. Dear Twisted, I miss you. Hope all is well with you and yours. Lindaxxx

    ReplyDelete

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