This may cause us some problems here in Nuova Lazio.
I'll be keeping a very careful eye (Not Sauron's) on The Basket Guy's relief requests, as I'm still the poor bugger arranging relief in our school.
But it's the other extras that cause me concern.
What about all the Trolls, Orcs, Elves, Hobbits and a Dragon that will be required for the film.
Our League team will probably head off enmass as Trolls.
Our Year 10s will be perfect as undisciplined, ugly, rampaging and carnivorous Orcs.
Our Year 9s will be perfect as little Hobbits, although they will need bigger (but not hairier) feet.
I'm not worried about the demand for Elves from amongst our pupils. Such ethereal and gentle creatures do not exist in Nuova Lazio. I suspect the League Team eats them for breakfast.
The Dragon would be our nice Fuhrermadchen.. She is definitely a Dragon when roused.
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| Guess who? |
Dwarves, how could I have forgotten the Dwarves. Our leader would make a spendid Dwarf. Strap some chain mail on him, attach a small iron helmet and give him a battle axe and he's all set. He exhibits the resolute determination and pugnacious character required of a Thórin.
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| I actually prefer a good cigar |
I see old Richard (of RBB) as Beorn more than Elrond. He has a bear-like presence don't you think?
ReplyDelete"Dwarves, how could I have forgotten the Dwarves. Our leader would make a spendid Dwarf. Strap some chain mail on him, attach a small iron helmet and give him a battle axe and he's all set. He exhibits the resolute determination and pugnacious character required of a Thórin."
ReplyDeleteIt scares me how clearly I can see this!
"So with me as Gandalf (a wizard with a spell) we're all set."
This one too!
Comeinyourpants, I don't know the names of the people in these stories - I hope you're being kind.
I'm being kind. Its been a good day. I've done all the tax stuff, had a nice walk and a swim. Nice Chardonnay now.
ReplyDeleteTC: You're absolutely right, Beorn is a better character for Richard[of RBB]
ReplyDeleteChardonay is good. In fact you've given me an idea. Whisky here I come.
I never understood why, at the end of LoTR a big eagle thing came and took the two wee hobbits away to safety - why didn't the bloody thing just drop them off there at the beginning and I could have been spared hours sitting in the cinema.....
ReplyDeleteActually, quite enjoyed the films - but did find the bit when Strider (forgotten his damned name) got crowned king and burst into song. I was bloody embarassed for him.
Bagsy me the Liv Tyler fairy role in the remake ;-)
AX
PS - word verification: soddings
I'm saying nothing.
Ali,
ReplyDeleteAragorn, son of Arathorn went beyond embarrasment, but we're lucky. Tolkein filled his books with Elvish songs and poems, Sir Peter Jackson wisely (I think) didn't use that many in his films.
Yes, you can be the Liv Tyler fairy, as long as you can do a product placement for "Fairy Liquid" and Loreal "Hair Conditioner and Straightener with built-in Radiant Glow"
I'm amazed that everyone hasn't read The Hobbit. It was prescribed reading at school for me and I guess I just assumed that it was the same for everyone else. I was also surprised that so many people hadn't read Lord of the Rings given that it was (still is?) on the top of the book list (lets forget the bible here) for about 40 years. I suppose from now on it is going to be vampire stuff.
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