She had originally wanted to go back in December (our Long Summer Holiday, 6 weeks) but I had
So all was set.
We got the news in March that my lovely daughter was now expecting, and that changed things.
My Beloved went into hyper-broody mode. Knitting hats, socks, jumpers and woolys of all description, in preparation for the great day.
Her plans had plans .
Her plans had plans which had plans, all based on a hidden agenda.
She wanted my lovely daughter to come to NZ to be with us.
So she decided that this was what would occur.
I wouldn't go to the UK, but she would go in October, and abandon me for 2 MONTHS, so she could look after our wee dear in Scotland, cook for her, make lots of little treats, and generally treat her as a princess.
|My wee Princess|
So last week I started the process of cancelling and changing the flights.
We were booked seperately because of the different times we originally wanted to fly out, so I cancelled my flight first.
No real problem, except for the cancellation cost of nearly $300. *sob*
Then I changed her flight to the new dates. I was on the phone to Expedia for almost 1½ hours trying to get the change through to comply with her wishes, but finally I succeeded at another cost of $60. *small sob *
So all was set.
Then my beloved came to me as I was relaxing with a rather large and restorative Whisky and said:
My Beloved (MB): "Dear?" (Every bloke knows that tone of voice. Wheedling and irritating)
Me: "Yes my Darling" (Nauseating I know, but needful)
MB: "Which airline am I booked on now?"
Me: "Qantas my Dear, same as before" (Which is why it was only a $60 change fee)
MB: "I don't like Qantas", "They're racist"
MB: "They're a bunch of rude racist Aussies, I don't want to fly with them"
Me: *stares goggle-eyed at my Beloved* "Eh?"
MB: "last time I flew on my own, they wouldn't serve me, and one of the Aussie b*tches shouted at me because I asked for some boiling water for the hot water bottle I was using on my back"
Me: "Are you sure my Dear?"
*long pause while I
Me: "Well, in that case, I'd better change it my Dear"
MB: "Yes please" "NOW"
Me: "Yes my Darling"
After another 2 hours on the phone, I'd managed to change the flight to another carrier, Singapore Airlines, which are definitely NOT racist.
Cost; $300 for cancellation of the
Me: "All done Dear"
MB "You took your time, didn't you?"
*exceptionally long suffering look to the dog, which ignored me and continued gnawing my slipper*
Me "Yes Dear" (God, I'm really a wimp sometimes)
Never mind, all was now set.
MB: "Darling?" (OH DEAR GOD, WHAT NOW?)
Me: "Yes my Dear?"
MB: "I've been thinking" (OH SHIT...the end of the universe is fast approaching)
Me: *cautiously* "Yes Dear?"
MB: "If the new flights are so expensive, why don't you look at some other alternatives" (Unspoken; "Why didn't you do this before")
Me: *incrediously* "What?"
MB: *THE LOOK*
Me: "Yes Dear" (in a broken, plaintive, but curiously dignified voice)
After another 2 hours on the web, searching for ANYTHING that might fit.
Me: "I think there's two alternatives my Beloved"
Me: "Either cancel the last-changed flight and rebook with Air New Zealand or?'
MB: "Or what?"
Me: "Or you could fly over there on your own little broomstick dear"
(I didn't actually say that, just thought it. Lovingly)
Me : "Or cancel and rebook on Singapore Air ourselves" "It'll save about $400"
MB: "I think Air New Zealand then."
Me: "Yes my Dear, I'll get right on it"
1½ hours later.
Me: "Right Dear, I've cancelled the
MB: "I've been thinking" (Will there ever be an end to this f*cking nightmare?)
MB: "I think I should fly with their Premium Economy" "As it will only be me, it won't cost too much"
At this point I would like to state categorically that I really do love my Beloved. But to quote a Yorkshireman I met in a pub, "they can make it awfully hard"
I should also like to point out that I have suggested many times that we fly Premium Economy or Business Class, but have been over-ruled on the reason of "We can spend the money much more usefully later"
There's some rules for them, and then there's the rules for the rest of us.
1½ hours later.
Me: "I'm just finishing the booking dear, you happy with the Premium Economy Class?"
MB: "I've been thinking..."
I've still not booked the f*cking flight.
I still think she'd do better on her broomstick.