How the hell does this work?: school. teaching

Showing posts with label school. teaching. Show all posts

Monday, 26 August 2013

Richter Surfing

It was another normal day in NLHS.

The usual steady file of miscreants, no-hopers and just plain evil b*stards was drifting through my office. I got rid of these teachers by showing either complete indifference or pretending to be deaf. (Getting old has some advantages)

RINGO IS GOING

Bye Suckers

This has been an incredibly odd month.

I've become a Koro (Grandfather in Maori), been trying to complete and proof-read my and colleagues' end-of-year reports been trying to help my students complete their last minute assessments, been trying to understand the new Level 3 standards for next year, been trying to organise next year's timetable and of course, trying to keep on top of all of the housework while my Beloved is away in the UK.

Then it got better... and worse.

First, the good news.

Ringo is departing.

He told us (the timetable committee) on Thursday that he's resigning and leaving to take up a new PPTA post.

After the cheering had died down (he looked a bit miffed for some reason at our obvious joy) I got some other news.

The Principal (Dancing Bear) has asked me to step in as acting Deputy Principal for at least the first term of 2013, which means a whole shit-load of extra duties and responsibilities, as well as continue as the Head of ICT (Computing) and to keep on doing relief.

I think I can do it, but it's worrying.

I can always try to emulate Ringo's style and do the following:

Piss off every teacher in the school and make at least 5 leave.
Become over-friendly with the pupils.
Ignore the bad behaviour of the pupils and tell everyone it's purely due to the home environment and blame the post-colonisation mindset of the Pakeha (Europeans)
Forget to tell ANYONE what my plans are.
Ignore deadlines and all important duties.
Grunt at colleagues passing in corridors as a form of greeting.
Bully the staff into accepting that THEY are always in the wrong.
Speak in a condescending manner to all and sundry, with a nasal Mancunian accent.
Screw up every computerised system available.
Lose 3 laptops in one year.
Insist that the students develop their skills in creating computerised portfolios and keep all their work on the "cloud" where it will promptly disappear.

If/when I take up the post, I'll try and keep Ringo's attitudes and behaviours in the forefront of my mind, and will try and always do the f*cking opposite of what he did.

I can't wait.

Tuesday, 14 August 2012

Being a Professional

Some of us, including me, at Nuova Lazio High School got an email from our Deputy Principal (DP).

Blogger's Block

I've got Blogger's Block.

I've lost the will to ~~live~~ blog.

Nothing I've done or am doing is worth writing down, and nobody would want to read it anyway.

I'm Back

Sorry for the hiatus, I'll explain all later.

Professional Wednesday in the Pit of Despair

So, you admit you don't know what a NOUN is?
I'm an artist for f*ck's sake.

Another Bloody Wednesday.

Another morning of Bloody Professional Torture.

More Bloody Reports

So, you admit you used the word "AND" twice in one sentence?

When will this torture cease?

Reports, Mayhem, 'Flu, Stress and Diarrhoea

This has not been a good week at Nuova Lazio High School.

Ringo Rattles Off

On Wednesday mornings, between the far-too-early times of 08:15 and 09:25, we, the Saintéd staff of Nuova Lazio High School (NLHS) are treated to a pedagogically uplifting presentation/diatribe/lecture/interactive bloody session, or what other type of communication is deemed suitable for our edification.